April 21, 2012
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My First Crush……Marilyn Monroe
My MarilynIt‘s a little damp outside today. I just made another pot of coffee and filled my stained and battered “GRAND DAD” cup. Read my paper until my blood pressure got the best of me and then tossed sections A & B into the trash and took the crossword and obituaries and put them in the bathroom for later. I thought I would get on my computer and vegetate for a while. I set my brain in neutral and allowed it to tumble down memory hill a few decades as I surfed old movies on Netflix. Then I saw her! I stopped my flashbacks around 1961. I was 14 and totally numbed, enthralled, cursed and erected over the most beautiful woman in the world, Marilyn Monroe……..I was a mess!
She was like a religious experience for me and therefore a “Goddess.” I had only recently launched into puberty and so far it was like the worst roller coaster ride I had ever been on. I did not understand why my body was doing the weird things it was doing and if someone I trusted had told me it was natures way of getting me ready to reproduce I would have fainted and not come to until I was 30. My voice had already defaulted to another octave and I was breaking out in hair! Girls had always been a pain in the ass, but the “agony” was now redirected to other parts of my body. Before my teens, I never knew girls had breast. Most likely I had just ignored them or just never noticed. I guess they had always had them….I just didn’t know. Now, at 14, I knew every breast in school……I was a mess!
The impact of these biological changes lead me to my infatuation with my first crush….. Marilyn Monroe. I barely remembered any of her movies prior to 1961 but once I was alerted to her existence, I watched them all frame after frame as if they belonged hidden under my mattress at home. I felt guilty about my feelings and very frustrated at the same time because I had no idea why I felt the way I did. Her beautiful glowing silk hair, her huge “take me” eyes and last of all those incredible carnivorous lips that wanted to feed on me. All these things enchanted me to the consistency of a lava lamp. I knew, if I were ever to meet her, my head as well as my loins would explode from shame. I loved her……I was a mess!
I did not know or would have cared that she was as dumb as a bucket of corn or that her virtues were written on every bathroom wall in Hollywood. She was my Marilyn. Yes, I loved her. She was in my dreams, which ignited other new phenomenon’s for me………I was a mess!
When I saw “The Misfits,” ten or so times, I was Clark Gable and her hero. I protected and saved her from her lousy life…….That was 1961. 1962 Marilyn Monroe died at her home from an overdose of pills, fame and conspiracy. This grip my young heart and did not let go for days. I can tell you there will never be another Marilyn. The excitement of who and what she was to this young man was special. 1962 was a heart felt and painful year ……….I was a mess!
Shortly after the blond died I saw the movie El Cid with the actress “Sophia Loren“……I was a mess!
Comments (8)
No one can ever replace Marilyn Monroe.
She always had the sweet/innocent thing going on.
MM was a legend, but I was totally besotted with BB.
Marilyn was amazing and no one will ever compare to her.
Apparently she had a very high IQ. She played a lot of dumb roles. But her beauty is so much, I son’t think there is anyone to take her place.
you told this really well. candid and very sweet
@bonmots - Thank you so much.
I loved Marilyn although she did not affect me the same way. I loved her talent for comedy. She made me laugh. Her timing was impeccable. I am sure you have many stories of being a mess!
@Greunie - You are special!!