April 24, 2012
-
Stop Babbling!!
“Pull my fingerum“
(“Pull my fingerum”)
We have advanced from a race of babbling barbarians, over 10,000 years ago, to being a modern culture of babbling cosmopolitans. We have, sadly, been mentally downsized in the fine art of being rhetorically cogent. We don’t know how to use words! Now, the word rhetorical is a catch-all word for those who use English like a cheap Bombay hooker. You can grunt and groan anything you verbally conjure up and refer to it as being rhetorical or even objectively subjective. I’m confusing myself, so let me get to the goiter of my point. When someone asks the question, “Is the glass half empty or is it half full?”— it’s obvious this Confucian wannabe never worked as a bartender. What a stupid reference to make about life! After I leave the smorgasbord….“am I half full or half empty?” And what the hell does “half ass” mean?? Is it something to do with cloning?
“The ends justify the means.” I was well into my thirties before I ever figured this one out, and it was while trying to cover my ass on my tax returns. Then there’s, “Don’t mind him, he really does have a good heart”—and a sorry immature attitude that’s just looking for a cyclonic ass-whooping! Sorry, flashbacks.
Last of all, the great elocutionist Socrates said, “Know thy self.” Three simple words. A rhetorical masterpiece. To my way of clear thinking, it’s obvious the old guy was talking about masturbating and from the many references to his male groupies, they were all famous for knowing each other’s self as well. I think a jealous toga boy fed him the hemlock smoothie. Aside from all this….my point is, just keep it simple. So, let the politicians and theologians do their rhetorical mumble jumble and let us just communicate in our ancestral gibberish, which is somewhere between rap and yodeling.
Charlie
DISCLAIMER: That little comment about my taxes was for the sake of swelling my humorous varicosity and was only a half truth……what the hell is a half truth? A half lie!!! God, my head hurts.
Comments (5)
lol Great advice. Thank you!
cya – cover your ass, a term discovered most certainly while waiting for the plumber to finish the job you should have called him over to first before trying to do it yourself. or cyahow very close to cyan or blue the stuff mixing to make the many colors of a print rainbow or…brown – you need the blue to become shitt brown. and magenta of a lousy tie as gift and the yellow chickenness to never admit you hate it so you wear it anyways… cya so close to cyan.
Nothing changes.
I like this and my ass is covered:)
@Grannys_Place - Well done!