July 15, 2012

• Cats….Me….and the Mailman.

   

   

       MY LITTLE TUFFY, WUFFY……

   

       Cats have been around for a long time. We have evidence of cats existing as far back as the time of the Neanderthal man. The fact that those cats could bring down a rhinoceros for their dinner is impressive also. Today, most cats just eat tuna. I remember our family cat when I was a kid….he ruled the house. Slept where and when he wanted, gave meow orders when he wanted to eat, sprayed the house like it was a mosquito control zone and threw a meow fit when you were slow letting it out at night to go shag Fluffy two houses down.

       I enjoyed our cat and spent many hours of amusement with it. I used to put rubber bands snugly around each paw and play an Elvis record and watch him dance and flip around the living room until he started to shake too much and then I cut the rubber bands off. The greatest fun was shutting him up in the mailbox and then taking a stick and banging on the side of the metal box and then running back in the house just before the mailman got there. The look of terror on that old guys face when he opened the mailbox was priceless! Those were good times. Later in life, the only time I was around cats was while alligator hunting in Florida, then PETA made the state outlaw it. You can use your imagination.

       My daughter got a kitten when she was ten years old and named it Tizzy. One Friday, she took Tizzy to school in her lunch box and left it on the bus. We got her a hamster named Rufus and a new lunch box the following Monday. So, please don’t misjudge me on my antics as a child, as Ritalin was not available then.  So you see, I don’t dislike cats and I truly feel they are a major part of our culture, just as they are in China. A cat can show love in truly unique ways, like goldfish and crows. Taking puss outside and tossing a stick for him to fetch is always a great past time, especially when you’re stoned. So, if my humor and the embellishment of a few facts has offended any cat lovers, I am truly apologetic and meant no disrespect to the felines. Likewise, I apologize to the mailmen of that era.

      One last comment…… They are the only mammal, that if they weigh less than 20 pounds, will jump and frisk around you and play with their rubber mouse all day. But, if they weigh over 20 pounds, they usually just eat you!

                                                                                         

                                                                                                         Charlie

   

   

   

  • 12:21 am
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